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By Dr. Ellen
Dear Dr. Ellen: My fiancee recently told me that she had sex with her ex-boyfriend that was videotaped. I'm afraid of what he could be doing with the tape(s). Now I'm having second thoughts about marrying her, what should I do? Please respond. - Robert
By Dr. Ellen
Dear Ellen: I have a problem with my fiancee. He is the sweetest guy I've ever known, I mean that. He asked me to marry him about a month ago, and of course I said yes. I really want to marry him but I don't feel ready and want to wait. I know if I tell him that, we will never get married. What should I do? - Heidi
By Dr. Ellen
Dear Ellen: I am a 54-year-old man and my sister is 57 years old. We have an aunt who is 93 years old. She has worked her whole life and has saved $40,000. She has a pension and Social Security. She is afraid to live alone anymore, so she recently moved to the state that I live in and has entrusted my sister and I with her life savings. She is now in an assisted living apartment and I pay the bills. Recently, my sister has decided to also move to this state and she wants to buy a house. She asked me if it was OK if she took $30,000 of my aunt's money to use towards a down payment on this house with the understanding that she would pay it back within a couple of months. I told her that it is not our money and that I did not want her to do it. She exploded, saying that she did not have to ask me and that she could take it if she wants but decided to ask me anyway.
By Dr. Ellen
Dear Valued Friends: In light of what happened on 9/11 I felt that it was important to send all of you a personal message rather than answer someone's relationship question. So many people postpone their happiness and quality of time spent with their mate and children because they honestly believe that there is always tomorrow. "Someday, when I have more money, someday when I lose some weight, someday when I'm less stressed, someday when I'm not so tired, that's when I'll concentrate on my personal life." In fact, some of you may be living your life according to Mark Twain's quip, "Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow." The lesson we all received on 9/11 was, that none of us know if we will have a tomorrow!
By Dr. Ellen
Dear Dr. Ellen: I hope you can help me with my problem. Two years ago, I began a friendship with a male. We became best friends. We did everything together. We watched movies, studied, ate, and talked hours on the phone every night. Our mutual friends would tease us most of the time as having a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship but I would tell them that we were just close friends, nothing more. Then, late last year he started to change. He did not call me every night and he was not as caring as before. A few days later, he told me he was seeing another girl and few months later, they were dating seriously. Soon after those things happened, I realized how insensitive I was. I was too insensitive to appreciate his sweet, thoughtful gestures for the past many months. My best friend and his girl have been together for 6 months now but why is it that I can't stand to see them together?
By Dr. Ellen
Dear Dr. Ellen: I want so badly to get on with my life but I don't know how to stop the pain. My wife and I are divorced. We have two children and all I want is for us to be a family again. What makes it worse is that she is currently seeing another man. How can I stop hurting? - David
By Larry Magid
In August 2008, the Justice Department indicted 11 people for hacking into the networks of nine major U.S. retailers and stealing 40 million credit and debit card numbers.
If you or your family shopped at TJ Maxx, BJ’s Wholesale Club, OfficeMax, Boston Market, Barnes & Noble, Sports Authority, Forever 21 or DSW your information could have been included in this online heist.
By Anne Collier
What to do when, where the social Web's concerned, the law protects sites more than users?
That's an unanswered question where the social Web's concerned. Social sites seem to have more protection from US law than their users have right now. A little-known section of the Communications Decency Act of 1996 (CDA) is what protects - rightfully, I think - Internet service providers and social-networking sites from liability for what's posted by users of their services, reports ConnectSafely.org co-director Larry Magid in his column in the San Jose Mercury News. It's a little like the way the phone company is not held liable for the nasty things people sometimes say to each other when using its service. [What's different about the social Web, of course - and what makes it much harder for victims or parents not to blame the service provider -
By Anne Collier
Here's some clarification, food for thought, ideas for family discussion, and a recommended curriculum for schools.
Lisa's experience of "cyberbullying" is probably the most common - some anonymous person(s) who made up "random screennames" and sent her IMs saying "stupid things" like "you're stupid" or "you're fat," she told a reporter from the Digital Natives project at Harvard University's Berkman Center. Though it probably wasn't cyberbullying as defined by researchers (see this), it certainly made her wonder: "Are my friends really my friends?" It was "kind of an uncomfortable ordeal because I never knew who it was in the end, but it wasn't as bad as being made fun of in real life could've been," Lisa, a University of Massachusetts, Amherst, student from New Jersey, said in an audio interview.
By Stephen Balkam
I have been thinking a lot about fear and how much it permeates our discussions and decisions in the online world, particularly regarding how we talk to our kids about possible dangers on the Net.
I had the huge privilege of attending two Aspen Institute events a couple of weeks ago, both of which addressed the issue of harmful content and parental fears about what their kids are exposed to online. It occurred to me that we are dealing with a range of fears – some real, some imagined.
By Anne Collier
If a young gamer's showing signs of addiction, "cold turkey" is far from the best course of action, Dr. Block suggests. Here's why....
The details emerging from a tragic national story about a missing boy in Canada point to an important observation about videogaming: that taking away a videogame (or device it's played on) does not have the same effect as taking away a toy or conventional game. Fifteen-year-old Brandon Crisp of Barrie, Ontario, missing for more than two weeks, left the house angry after his father took away his Xbox console. His father told the Toronto Globe and Mail that "this has become his identity, and I didn't realize how in-depth this was until I took his Xbox away." His mother "would wake in the middle of the night to hear ...
To generate great ideas, develop the 7 habits that follow. These are actions and thought patterns you can use to come up with many creative ideas and solutions. They'll work right now if you try them, but if you want to be a truly effective creative problem solver, make such techniques into habits. How? Just use them daily for three weeks or more.
1. Start With Deep Breathing And Relaxation
Let the tension release from your neck and shoulders, and breathe deeply through your nose for a few minutes. Shoulder and neck tension may reduce blood flow to the brain. There is also a lot of evidence that creativity increases with relaxation.
2. Know You'll Have Good Creative Ideas
Are you interested in meeting new people online? If so, there is a good chance that you have heard of social networking websites before. Social networking websites are, in a way, like a community. They allow internet users to connect with and communicate with each other. Despite the fact that social networking website have rapidly increased in popularity and their popularity is only expected to keep on rising, there are many internet users who are unsure as to whether or not social networking websites are for them.
If you are interested in determining whether or not you should join an online networking website, you are encouraged to think about why those websites are so popular. Doing so will enable you to determine why other internet users make the decision to join an online social network. After that close examination, you may even find that those are the same reasons why you should or want to join. One of those reasons is the ability to easily meet other internet uses.
When you have ADD, your brain moves very quickly from one thing to another, and you're very creative. What you may not realize is that the more successful you are with your ideas, the more creative your brain becomes. You'll be thinking about whatever your passion is every second you're awake and things will just start coming to you at the speed of light.
You go! But you have to stop a second and see that millions of great ideas are worth zilch, if you're just letting them fly by or if you're going from one idea to another. ADD makes you distracted. But here's the thing... if you're constantly moving from one thing to the next and never getting anything accomplished, you're missing the boat.
This is it: You have to take just ONE of your great ADD ideas and work it through. It makes that idea a
There are a lot of different types of people out there in the world. Some people can mindlessly kill people. Some people injure others without remorse. Some people are able to injure others or defend themselves if provoked. Some people are so timid they would not be able to hurt a fly. Then there are the people in between. Where do you think you fit in? Where do you actually fit?
Now we are talking nature and demeanor. Nature is your inner personality, which actually would show under stress. Your demeanor is your outward appearance or mannerism, which may hide your true self, if only temporarily. Sometimes nature and demeanor are almost identical, but most often they are rather different.
