With Friends Like These Who Needs Enemies

I remember when I was a little kid and me and some friends were all staying over at the same house we used to pour water on the wrist of the person who dared to fall asleep first. This was an attempt to get them to wet themselves. I do not think it ever worked.

Eventually when we got older we advanced to drawing on their faces with permanent markers. Perhaps we would put shaving cream on their nose and then attempt to tickle their nose so they would smack the shaving creme thereby splattering it all over. This is just the type of thing we did in Indiana.

Two young men in California have taken it to a higher level. They do not mess around in California.

On January 18th in Grover Beach California three young men were drinking. One apparently had a little too much and passed out. One of the other two decided it would be funny to pour cologne on their victims crouch. At some point they apparently got bored with this little stunt and then thought it would be a real hoot if they lit his now cologne soaked crotch on fire.

Yes you read this correctly. But feel free to read it again because this is an unbelievable yet, true story.

Please insert your own Jerry Lee Lewis, "Great Balls of Fire" joke at this time.

I am wondering at what level of intoxication do you think that this would be funny or turn out any other way than it did.

Friendship used to mean so much more. I guess that was just "back in the day".

The two young men were just sentenced. Matthew Pillers and Jack Keiffer pleaded no contest to felony causing a fire that leads to great bodily injury.

Pillers who had violated his parole because of this act of stupidity was sentence to two years in a state prison. In a move that is still causing me to wrinkle my brow decided to forego 270 days in county jail because he did not want to be on probation and parole at the same time. Huh?

Something tells me that his crotch might be a little tender and sensitive as well very soon.

I could question the victims, Elliot Tuleja's, judgment considering his choice of friends. However, the man has second and third degree burns on his testicles.

I will leave the guy with toasty testes alone.